


Winter Game Nonsense

by skyeheartridge



Category: Final Fantasy Type-0, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Humor, Magic, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2015-03-26
Packaged: 2018-03-19 19:05:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3620895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyeheartridge/pseuds/skyeheartridge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yazoo, Kadaj, and Loz are bored standing in the middle of the park on a cold winter day, but they encounter a young boy with a strange card that changes everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Winter Game Nonsense

**Author's Note:**

> In the story, there's a game of "replacement," where a certain letter like "O" gets replaced with "A" and "T" gets replaced with "P." For example, "Today is boring" turns into "Padoy is baring." This is just a little warning beforehand... if anyone gets confused!

_The curse is on you. Beware of letters O, A, T and P!_

At the park of a cold December afternoon, a group of three silver-haired men—a man with a spiked crew cut, one short hair to the shoulder, and the other with long hair to the waist—stand in a circle next to a large Christmas tree. The park is busy and a lot of people take pictures under the large Christmas tree. People seem very happy, but the three have no idea what’s going on and look irritated and very disturbed.

“Hey,” says the man with short hair.

The crew cut replies to his comment. “Yo, Kadaj—

“I didn’t tell you to reply, Loz!!”

After Loz replied to Kadaj, he received a loud and heavy slap across the face. “Ouch!! What’s the big deal!?”

“Ahem. Anyway, why are we out here in the cold!?”

“Wasn’t it your idea?”

“Shut up, Loz! It was Yazoo’s idea. Right, Yazoo?”

Yazoo combs a few strands of his long silver hair with his seemingly frail fingers and stares at both Loz and Kadaj indifferently. “We’re here because we heard from Tifa that being in the park is ‘fun.’”

“’Fun!? How is standing here doing nothing in this cold winter day ‘fun!?’” Kadaj’s face turns red in fury while he continues to yell, “And why do you listen to Tifa in the first place, right, Loz!?”

Loz was silent only for a few seconds after Kadaj yells enthusiastically. Then, he says while subtly pointing out his finger to the crowd of people under the tree, “It’s… it’s not bad, I mean… the people look nice and happy—

“Why do I even bother asking you of all people!?” Kadaj disjointed Loz’s index finger.

“Ouch!!”

“You know,” Yazoo speaks up. “I think I’ll leave to go somewhere warm and quiet.”

Loz grabs Yazoo’s arm with the face of a crybaby. “No! I’ll be alone with this mean person, AKA Kadaj!”

When Yazoo let loose of Loz’s grip, a strange boy in a red, black, and white high school uniform interrupts the three by walking within their circle. The boy has light-colored short blond hair that looks almost like the color silver and eyes of a sky blue, like he’s Kadaj's long lost twin brother. He flips his short hair with grace and shows them a deceitful look on his face.

“Kadaj,” Loz points out with his dislocated index finger. “Doesn’t this wimpy guy kind of look like you?”

The wimpy boy gets irritated by being called a wimpy guy and tells them, "I'm not 'wimpy guy.' My name is Ace."

"Whatever. You still look like Kadaj, wimpy kid."

“Shut up!” Kadaj hears Loz makes fun of them and twists his injured finger.

“Woooow!! Ouch!!”

“That’s what you get for making me mad.”

Ace and Yazoo stand awkwardly while Kadaj and Loz yell at each other. But something made them calm—the feeling of warmth. Where was this “warmth” coming from? They looked over to the boy with his hand out and a card catching itself on fire.

“What is that thing!?”

“It’s a flame, Kadaj,” Yazoo says nonchalantly with his eyes focused on the flame.

"And what are you even doing here, kid!?"

With his right hand out holding up the card on fire, Ace holds up another card in his left hand in front of the three silver-haired men. “Do you want to play a game?”

“Really!?” Kadaj and Loz say at the same time. “What game!?”

Yazoo continues to stay silent and listens to the blond. “Watch out for the letters O, A, T, and P.”

After that, Ace crumples the card, drops it to the ground, and walks away with a smirk.

“Well, that was weird.”

Loz replies to Kadaj, “I knaw. He ocps sa mysperias ip’s spupid.”

Yazoo coughed and hid his smile by looking down after hearing Loz speak, but Loz couldn’t ignore it. “Hey! Yau were loughing, weren’p yao, Yozaa—woip, why da I saund like phis!?”

“Hohoho!! Yao soid Yazoo!!” Kadaj stops and looks at Loz and Yazoo with confused expressions. “Woip, Did I jusp soy ‘Hahaha’ like Sonpo Clous!? Phop’s funny!”

Yazoo clears his throat, lifts his head back in place, and tries to speak too, hoping he would sound just like them. “I sound funny too.”

Loz and Kadaj look at Yazoo in silence with disappointment written on both of their faces. They both start to point in laughter at Yazoo after a short few seconds of quietness. “Hohohoho!! He’s olane!”

“Why do I get left out…?” Yazoo squints his eyes. He makes a face like he’s stabbing the two with only his glare.

“Moybe ip’s becouse yau’re paa seriaus.”

“Laz, phop isn’p o gaad reosan,” says Kadaj resting his right arm on Loz’s right shoulder, trying to hold in his laughter. “Bup ip’s funny!”

Yazoo growls at the yell-laughing duo in jealously, because they’re the only ones having fun and not him. But he wasn’t alone for long when a young man—blond hair and blue eyes with dark clothing—and woman—black hair and brown eyes wearing a revealing white top and black shorts—walk towards the three. They, too, look just as confused as Yazoo, but Loz and Kadaj’s confused looks turned into joy.

“Whop’s wiph oll phe loughper, guys?”

“Hohoho! Pifo saunds funny!” Kadaj points and laughs at the black haired lady named Tifa. “I bep Claud saunds funny paa!!”

Yazoo says sternly, “No, Cloud is just as serious. He won’t talk that way.”

The young man named Cloud standing next to Tifa crosses his arms trying to understand the situation. Yazoo had a good feeling that Cloud wouldn’t speak strangely, so he started to smile subtly. But that small amount of hope diminished once Cloud said one word.

“Whop?”

“Hohohoho!! He soid ‘what!’” Kadaj couldn’t stand laughing so much along with Loz, but he was unable to stop himself that he had the urge to slap his knee several times.

“Hohoho… Claud, yau’re funny—I meon, I’m funny,” Tifa giggles and covers her wide smile with her dainty fingers. “Why da I saund like phis onywoy?”

“I dan’p knaw!!” Loz and Kadaj say at the same time while cackling.

Yazoo stands in place staring at everyone else in the group thinking they look like freaks, but although he thinks that, he feels like he’s the freak for not talking the same way they are. He wasn’t sure if everyone in public talk similar to the four in front of him or if it’s just the people he knows. According to their stares, the people aren’t staring at Cloud, Tifa, Loz, or Kadaj. They were staring at only Yazoo.

_What is this sensation? Aren’t Tifa, Cloud, Kadaj, and Loz supposed to be embarrassed for talking like that? But then again… why is the public only staring at me like I’m literally the outcast?_

Trying to eavesdrop on strangers’ conversations nearby, he realizes that everyone really is talking the same way as Cloud, Tifa, Loz, and Kadaj. He obviously doesn’t understand why the situation is the way it currently is.

“Hey, isn’p phop lang hoired guy polking weird?”

“Moybe he’s o fareigner.”

“Yeoh, he daes seem kind af weird paa.”

“Hohohoho! Wha cores!”

Yazoo can’t take in some conversations he’s hearing from other people, and even though he pretends not to hear them, he still knows that he’s a loner. With that thought, all he can do is stand in place with nothing to do, because he knows the four next to him will end up making fun of him.

_How did this even happen? Is there any way for them to stop talking like this? Maybe they’re doing this intentionally to piss me off._

He stared at the ground thinking intensely on why this ever happened. Then, he noticed the crumpled card on the ground that the weird boy dropped before walking away. Picking it up and looking at it front and back, there were only weird drawings and patterns on it that he couldn’t understand.

Yazoo tried to ignore Kadaj’s loud voice speaking to him. “Hey, Yozaa, yau dan’p hove pa be silenp phe enpire pime.”

“Yeoh, ip’s akoy if yau’re lefp aup.”

After Loz says that one comment, everyone in the group laughs except for Yazoo. Yazoo only stares at the wrinkled card in his hand and tries to pay no attention to them.

But Tifa interrupted Yazoo’s train of thoughts when she picked up the card from his hand and looked at it. “Whop’s phis cord far? Is ip imtarponp?”

_Didn’t this card start it all? This card made everyone talk weird. I’m sure of it. That boy even said “watch out for letters o, a, t, and p” and crumpled the card. Maybe it’s some type of spell._

“Give it to me!”

“Whao!!”

Yazoo grabbed the card harshly and rips it in pieces. His angry eyes and clenching teeth scared the four staring at him. It was like looking at a monster and shivering in fear. Was Yazoo always like this? He doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to freak out over a situation like this—being an outcast while everyone talks like foreigners.

Pointing at the ripped pieces of the awkward card on the ground, he tells them in a strict tone of voice, “This did it all! Now, talk again, Tifa!”

As everyone was still surprised about Yazoo’s sudden fury, Kadaj wondered what the big deal is. “Yazoo, cool down, bro—huh? What happened to my voice?”

“Hey, what’s with you talking normally Kadaj!?” Loz said to him with little anger, but realized that he’s talking normally just like Kadaj. “Aw, that’s so uncool! I’m not talking like a baby anymore.”

Tifa laughs while Cloud just stands there looking at her in silence. Then, she replies, “Well, at least everything is back to normal. Yazoo felt left out.” She looks at Yazoo looking downwards and wondered if he’s still feeling like an outcast.

“It’s fine, Yazoo. Why don’t you talk now?”

Yazoo looks at Tifa smiling at him, but unexpectedly, his face went from angry to sad.

“Why om I spill lefp aup?”

“Hahahaha!! He’s talking weird now!!” Kadaj and Loz point and laugh at him again.

“Haw da I gep bock pa narmol?”

Without any clue as to how he can talk normally, he walks away alone sulking as everyone in the group laughs loudly like they’ve been doing for almost an hour.

_I wished I cauld polk weird like phem, bup naw whop da I da…?_

As Yazoo walked away, he found Ace hidden in the park’s snowy trees who caused the entire mess. The blond showed a mischievous expression like he had before, and said, “I’m sure you weren’t bored anymore. It would be fun to talk like a baby forever, right?”

Ace walked away with a smirk and disappeared within the trees of the park carrying heaps of snow. Yazoo froze in place after knowing he might baby talk forever, and all the negative feelings he’s been keeping to himself turned his face beet red.

“Phis is spupid!!”


End file.
